Saturday, July 2, 2011

Probably inappropriate, but what the hell...

Texts from the Toilet Stall

While out shopping today, my gut started not feeling so well.  Like most women, I only do that business at home unless it's an extreme emergency.  My rumbly tumbly quickly became less than happy, so I ran off to the store bathroom (while praying that it was deserted).  RCC was patiently waiting on me, so I thought I'd be courteous and let him know it'd be a while:

Me: It'll be a few minutes.  I've got mud falling outta my ass.
Me:  Didn't even get out of the stall before the next round hit.
RCC:  Really?
Me: I broke out in a sweat.
RCC: You're gross.
Me:  Nu-uh
RCC:  Uh-uh
Me:  Bad butt.  Guess the body's not so happy with our recent diet.
RCC:  Hehe I'm fine.
Me:  Brat.  I'm giving leaving the stall another go.  Wish me luck.
RCC: G'luck
In the midst of my updating RCC on the status of my bad butt, Digger sent me a text.
Digger: Find anything for ur favorite son?
Me: Where?
Digger: As in a vehicle miss old timer.  Did ya forget :P
Me: Haven't looked yet.  I'm out shopping for parade stuff, that's where the confusion came from.
Digger: U suck
Me: Do not.  Currently, I am less than sucking.  I've got shit falling out of my ass, which is pretty much the opposite of sucking.
Digger: Thats gross. This is y old people shouldn't be allowed to text. (Don't you love that my son will make sure he uses the contraction for should not, yet shortens "why" to "y"?)
Me: Why?  You texted me first.
Digger: Cuz ur gross. Anywho...I forgot
Me: Now leave me along so I can complete my job here.
Digger: Fine cranky
Me: I'll talk to you when I'm done turning myself inside out.  Love you.
Yep.  Those kind of text convos are absolutely normal in the GunDiva/RCC household.  Aren't you glad I could share?


Allenspark Lodge said...

Texting it is bad enough, but blogging? I'm gunna tell your mom...Oh wait, I wont have to. She follows you, too.


Mrs Mom said...

Butt Explosions are totally not bloggable.. lol

You aint right girl. gotta be the thin air up there ;)

Mr. Daddy said...

ROFL, not for the condition, I hate the growlers.....LOL

Butt... for the text surrounding it...

Being from a household that can only use text for our conversations I totally understand...*snort*

P.S. hope everything came out all right in the end.....*snort,wheeze,cough,BWAHHAAAAAA...*

Rachel said...

ARGH! I was cringing at the thought that I would find Mr. Daddy's comment here...

Butt frankly, Mrs. Mom had me cracking up. Well, and Bill too... and Mr. Daddy - yeah, still cringing on that one.

You know, the least those boys could have done was give you some electronic morale support while you were in there... MEN. sigh

The Minute Man's Wife said...

I understand you were obviously traumatized by this experience so you had to blog about it to try and "relieve yourself"

Shepherd K said...

It's a relief to know that you give a crap...unless you are just stalling.

Oh...and remind me never to borrow your phone.

Aunt Crazy said...


We totally have inappropriate text convos all the time...heeheehee