It's back! Boy have I missed True Story Tuesdays, the laugh-a-thon hosted by Rachel and Mr. Daddy over at Once Upon A Miracle. Head on over there to link up and read more stories of hilarity or plain embarrasment. *Potty mouth alert*
I think that I've established that Sunday was not the best driving day ever, what with the bicycle thing and all. Even when I got back into town on Sunday evening the stupid drivers were still out and I swear they were out to get me.
At one point some idiot darted across a four-lane highway in front of me, which was mildly irritation. What was down-right infuriating was the second idiot who decided to scoot across behind the first idiot. In a little alien green bullet traveling fifty-five miles an hour, I was not a happy camper and hit the brakes while fumbling for the horn.
I stabbed what I thought were the horn buttons with both thumbs and nothing happened. In frustration, I yelled "where the fuck is the horn?!" not realizing that I'd pushed my bluetooth button and Ripley was waiting for instructions. You know, simple instructions like "call Lodge", not cursing because I couldn't find the horn.
I finished my outburst, still not realizing I'd activated my bluetooth. There was a pause, then, very politely..."Pardon?"
I thought Monster was going to pee his pants he was laughing so hard at the absolute perfect timing my mild mannered car had.