Monday, September 20, 2010

True Story Tuesday - Pardon?

It's back!  Boy have I missed True Story Tuesdays, the laugh-a-thon hosted by Rachel and Mr. Daddy over at Once Upon A Miracle.  Head on over there to link up and read more stories of hilarity or plain embarrasment. *Potty mouth alert*

I think that I've established that Sunday was not the best driving day ever, what with the bicycle thing and all.  Even when I got back into town on Sunday evening the stupid drivers were still out and I swear they were out to get me.

At one point some idiot darted across a four-lane highway in front of me, which was mildly irritation.  What was down-right infuriating was the second idiot who decided to scoot across behind the first idiot.  In a little alien green bullet traveling fifty-five miles an hour, I was not a happy camper and hit the brakes while fumbling for the horn.

I stabbed what I thought were the horn buttons with both thumbs and nothing happened.  In frustration, I yelled "where the fuck is the horn?!" not realizing that I'd pushed my bluetooth button and Ripley was waiting for instructions.  You know, simple instructions like "call Lodge", not cursing because I couldn't find the horn.

I finished my outburst, still not realizing I'd activated my bluetooth.  There was a pause, then, very politely..."Pardon?"

I thought Monster was going to pee his pants he was laughing so hard at the absolute perfect timing my mild mannered car had.


Rachel said...

Oh no way. Just OH NO WAY!

That is just nutso!

And perfect timing!

You cracketh me up!

Thanks for linking up... you are the best at making me laugh :)

Maggie said...

*snicker* This is too funny! Awesome timing!

Mrs Mom said...

Dude- for real? The car TALKS BACK???

Holy shit.. lmao.. oooo what fun can be had with THAT now.. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

(You'd best hope and pray Hubby and Bill don't sort out some way to corrupt Ripley and make it say very bad things to you... ;) )

K. Erickson said...

Didn't talking cars go out of style in the '80s? Mrs. Mom beat me to the punch about an RCC and Bill warning.

Allenspark Lodge said...

Maybe something like "Sorry, I didn't
HAIR what you said"

Aunt Crazy said...


Kelly said...

That is so perfect!!!!!!!!


Kmama said...

Stopping by from Once Upon a Miracle.

Okay, that is too funny!!! You couldn't time that more perfectly if you had tried.

Beth Zimmerman said...

THAT was hilarious! Thanks for the giggles. I needed some today!

Mr. Daddy said...


NO WAY!!!!!

You just made that up......ROFL

great story...

Stacyonthecouch said...

frigging hilarious, I would be mortified for ANYONE to hear my outbursts in the car ... lol

Brandi said...

LOL! That is too funny. I had to read about the cyclist too. Ugh. I hate 'em. Not any of them that have to ride a bike for transportation, just the ones all decked out in their spandex. I like to play a little game called 'spray the cyclist' and I might choose to clean my windshield just as I'm driving past... it's hilarious.